Monday, May 23, 2011

Giving

When asked for spare change on a bus, do you give it in the hopes that the receiver uses it to improve his or her own situation?  Or do you assume that the receiver will use it for nefarious purposes and save your change for something better or someone more deserving?  Are you morally obliged to give to the have-nots if you have?  Some interesting questions, I think.  I'd love a discussion.

Yesterday afternoon I walked to Marion Square in Charleston, SC.  I brought my Kindle, my Bärenreiter score for Die Zauberflöte, a Bobble water bottle, and a can of Arizona tea.  I was wearing pretty nice summer clothes: white shorts, button up shirt, black glasses, and red and black converse-qua-sperry shoes.  This detail is all important because I postulate that it affected the following discourse.

I'm sitting on a bench near a hexagonal fountain (that ironically had engravings of great moral questions on each side) reading Gulliver's Travels when a man walks up to me.  His look is rather disheveled, his shirt is dirty and ripped in places, his pants are far too large for him, and he's missing some teeth.  I'm not frightened so much as I am cautious.  He asks me a question I don't quite hear; it had something to do with being a student or a musician.  He then asks my name, shakes my hand, asks if I'm in college.  I answer his questions as politely as I can to a stranger who so abruptly appeared and interrupted my book.  Then, he quickly veered the conversation towards his actual intent: "do you have 60¢ so I can ride the bus?"

I knew it was coming, though I suppose I should say I assumed it was coming.  It is very rare for a stranger to approach me, inquire into my well-being, and not ask for money.

I tell him the truth, "I'm sorry, man, I don't have any money on me at all."  That should be the end of the conversation.  Perhaps he could say, "thanks anyway," or something along those lines.  But that would make for a boring story, now wouldn't it?

He doubts me and proceeds to ask about my possessions.  Pointing to my 99¢ can of tea, he asks me where I got it (the tone of his voice implied he thought I must have some change if I bought a can of tea).  I told him I brought it from home.  He asks me about the Kindle and if I was reading a novel (again, the tone of his voice implied his disbelief that someone with a Kindle could be changeless).  In other words, he refused to give me the benefit of the doubt.

I understand his situation and I sympathize.  Even if I can't empathize, I can understand that begging for bus money from strangers is not the way he would like to live his life.

Or, at least that is what I choose to believe.

I have no problem giving money away to people who need it.  I have no qualms about helping someone out with a few dollars.  I do it all the time.  Every time I go to NYC, I bring a pocketful of change because I know someone is going to ask for 50¢ to ride the bus or $1.00 so he or she can get something to eat.  I choose to believe that this change is going where they say it's going.  I don't really have the time or patience (or attention span) to watch them or take other measures to ensure it isn't spent on drugs or alcohol.  I give them the benefit of the doubt because taking a pessimistic view of humanity is not only depressing, but it supports a negative expectation, which inevitably leads to a negative outcome.

I did not appreciate the questioning.  He said, "alright, I believe you..." as if he actually did not believe me, but couldn't really do anything about it.  My immediate thought was, "I have no obligation to provide you with bus money and I have no obligation to explain myself to you."  In reality, I do feel I have an obligation to give if I have.  How I give is debatably "good" or "bad," but I do feel that I must give.  But!  I have no obligation at all to explain to someone why I won't or can't give them money.

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A friend asked me after I recounted the story to him whether giving money to beggars is promoting laziness and perpetual poverty.

This is an interesting and easily debatable topic...

The answer is twofold: yes and no.  By giving money to anyone who asks, I am certainly making it far too easy for them to survive that way with no desire or need to improve their own situations.  At the same time, what if no one gave any of them anything?  Should we leave them to die on the streets?  The guy sleeping in the train station has no home to go to and has no food or money with which to acquire it.    I suppose I could direct him to a shelter or food bank, but these are always overcrowded and rarely adequate.

It is a moral battle I will think about more in the coming months.